How to Get Over the Fear of Public Speaking
From a keynote speaker whose first talk, by his own admission, was not very good.
You do not get over the fear of public speaking by waiting until you feel confident. You get over it by speaking, starting small, preparing your opening cold, and letting each talk teach you something. Expect your first few to be imperfect. Confidence comes after the experience, not before it.
Today I speak to leaders and organizations across the country. I did not start there. I started with a lot of applications that went nowhere and one that finally said yes.
When I started trying to speak at conferences, every application asked for videos, testimonials and references I did not have. It felt like a catch-22. How was I supposed to get speaking experience if nobody would give me a chance without speaking experience?
Eventually I stopped waiting until I felt qualified and started applying anyway. Most opportunities led nowhere. But eventually, one said yes.
Looking back, that first presentation was not very good compared to what I know now. That is the point. I was not supposed to be great yet. I was supposed to learn.
After that first talk, I studied other speakers, invested in coaching, refined my talks and kept applying for bigger opportunities. The fear did not disappear first. It just got smaller every time I did it anyway.
You can feel fear without obeying it.
Seven steps to speak even when you are nervous
Expect to be nervous
Nerves are not a sign you should not be up there. They are a sign it matters to you. The goal is not to remove the fear. It is to stop letting it make the decision.
Start smaller than you think
Speak up in a team meeting. Give a two-minute update. Offer a toast. Small reps build the container so the fear takes up less room.
Know your first minute cold
The first minute is where nerves are loudest. Know your opening line and the story you will tell first well enough that you could say it half asleep. Once you are moving, it gets easier.
Tell a true story
Stories are easier to remember than slides, and audiences connect with them. Tell something that actually happened to you, including the part where it did not go well.
Talk to one person at a time
Do not try to speak to a crowd. Speak to one person for a sentence or two, then another. A room is just a lot of one-on-one conversations happening at once.
Answer the voice
When your inner voice says “You are going to embarrass yourself,” answer it: “I do not need to be perfect. I have handled hard things before, and I will handle this too.”
Review, then do it again
After each talk, ask what went well, what you would change and what you will do differently next time. Then book the next one. Reflection plus repetition is the whole method.
The confidence did not come
before the experience.
It came because of it.
Why public speaking feels so scary
Speaking in front of people puts us right up against our comfort ceiling: the fear of being judged, of forgetting, of looking like we do not belong. That is exactly why it is one of the fastest ways to grow. Every time you do it, you find out your limit was not where you thought it was.
This connects to The Comfort Ceiling and Train Your Inner Voice. If you lead a team, How to Give Feedback People Actually Use can help you coach others through it too.
Common questions
How can I stop being nervous about public speaking?
You probably will not stop being nervous entirely, and that is okay. Start small, know your opening cold, tell true stories and speak to one person at a time. The nerves shrink with repetition.
What is the fastest way to get over fear of public speaking?
Speak more often in low-stakes settings. Repetition does more than any trick, because confidence comes from experience.
Is it normal to be scared of public speaking?
Yes. It is one of the most common fears there is. Experienced speakers still get nervous. They have just learned to speak anyway.
What should I do if I forget what to say?
Pause, take a breath and go back to your next story or point. The audience rarely notices a pause as much as you do.
Start small, know your first minute cold, tell a true story, and book the next one. Confidence comes after, not before.
You Are Capable
of More.
Ten principles for becoming the person you know you are capable of being, built from real stories of people who doubted themselves and did it anyway. Winner of the How-To category at the 2026 Paris Book Festival.
When I’ve got something worth sending.
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